Eva’s two month anniversary of her operation was Tuesday. We celebrated by being nervous and worried about her chest X-Rays the next afternoon. Well, maybe that’s just how I celebrated, her and her brother played all day at the park. I wrote this post in a different order than I’m posting it so I’m sorry if the continuity seems a little weird, but I’m rather scatterbrained anyway and I don’t wanna give anything away.

We’ve been undergoing chemo for six weeks now and so far things have gone well. Her platelets drop the second week after chemo basically everytime we’ve done chemo. At the second week mark after the first round of chemo, they were low and she had a nasty mucous coming out of her vagina (she has an inverted vulva) so cystitis was in question. Also she developed a hematoma after a blood draw so we had to do a coagulation panel. Great, just what we wanted…. Surprisingly it was all nothing. The mucous in her vulva and vagina was just staph which happens actually all the time with her inversion. No cystitis. The coagulation panel came back normal too so we’re not too sure what happened with the blood draw aside from maybe something got poked wrong or pulled too hard or who knows what. We went ahead and did a second round of chemo and then decided to test her blood at two weeks post carbo since that was the lowest point for her that they had been at. SO. We tested them at two weeks this time, which was last week ( the 21st,)  and her platelets were even lower than before. So for a week I sat on pins and needles. No rough play with the puppy which is hard because her energy is back with the most obnoxious vendetta for me. She was sick for so long, I forgot what she REALLY was like, and sometimes I question if I can even HANDLE a healthy Eva with a puppy. Luckily, Bowie is the sweetest babe in the world.

Eva’s second monthaversary was July 28th, which should’ve been a chemo day with chest scans. But our oncologist was full so we had to go in Wednesday. This is the first time she has had chest X-Rays since her diagnosis. When she was diagnosed with osteosarcoma, we knew things potentially might not always be good. The probability of every vet visit being a happy one when you go once or more a week just isn’t there. So, everytime it’s a big visit like this, I get nervous. Especially when the last two-week-check went so scarily, and then this one was so low…

But we came to the appointment, and they took Eva back, and I waited, and I was scared. And they brought Eva to me, and I cried on her. I held her and I cried because for the first time since her amputation I was actually scared. I had always said I was planning for things to go wrong, but I must’ve forgotten that in this moment where I thought everything was going good and then the possibility of it not hit me right in the face.

And then the door opened-

and then the doctor told me that everything was perfect. NO lung mets. NO bad bloodwork. All was ready for another round of chemo and then to go home, just like every other time we had come here! Oh my dog. I lost it. I jumped around with Eva and she gets SOOOO excited when I get excited so her and I were having a little party and the nurse Jessica was laughing so hard. I think she loves Eva. But anyway, Eva and I were jumping and dancing and happy butt-ing everywhere. And then they took her back for chemo, I paid, and then I brought her home!

Things have been moving so quickly around here lately- I thought I had posted for Eva’s one month but apparently I missed it entirely! That makes me pretty sad since it was such a happy day. I honestly wasn’t sure, on the day of her surgery, that I would get another month with her. She was so sick and so sad for so long I just couldn’t imagine putting her through that anymore. And the first two weeks of recovery, while I could tell things were at least not getting WORSE, I was still so unsure that the decision I had made was for HER and not for ME. I know I needed to have her in my life for longer than the three years we had spent, I knew she still loved being alive, she just didn’t love her circumstance. I told her no matter what happened, I would be there for her until she didn’t need me there anymore, and if she was done trying to feel better, she didn’t have to try anymore. She tried for seven months to feel better, if she was tired, I understood… that’s almost a third of her lifetime with her leash racks diligently trying to diagnose something presenting as a slight limp with no other presentations / test result possibilities…

Anyways, not the point. Monthaversary 1 brought us pupcakes and dog cookies and long walks with the puppy. And in the time between monthaversary 1 and monthaversary two brought us time spent with family, even more improvements with her health, a million new vet bills, a ruffwear float coat, and lots of new toys every time mama leaves the house! We’ve swam, we’ve cuddled, we’ve napped, all for 63 days longer than I ever thought I would be allowed to. She loves me so much, and I love her so, so, so much. She loves her little brother, too. They’re inseparable.

I never thought that I could love something as much as I love Eva. And when I got her, I never realized I would feel like this. I was never a dog person, and I’m only 21 so kids definitely haven’t happened yet, and I’ve just never felt like this about anything. No matter what happens from day to day, I’m on her side, I’m with her, no matter what. I tell her every single day when we go to bed if that’s the last good day we had, it was the best day I’ve ever had. She’s my angel and if it hadn’t been for getting her I would’ve never been alive for this long. Ever. I was in the most unhealthy state when we found each other and I always thought I saved her life. After the first year of being together, I got so offended when people would call her a rescue dog, or say “oh you must’ve saved her!” She saved ME. Don’t ever get that twisted, I know I don’t.

Anyway, enough talking. Here’s some pictures!!!!